The Fine Art of Being Strong & Avoiding Being a Pushover

Strong Women - Entrepreneur Emily Lyons

Being kind is good for your relationships and necessary to live a productive life. However, there’s a difference between being kind and people-pleasing. If there’s one habit that will stop your success, it’s the habit of always trying to please everyone else. Strong people know how to set boundaries, communicate
them properly and stand up for themselves when necessary.

1. Be confident

Finding strength starts with being confident. When you believe in yourself, what you do, people notice and respect your confidence. However, it’s important to know when it’s prudent to listen to others and make changes based on their feedback. It’s not a weakness to be open-minded, but don’t make everything optional or up for debate. If someone is critical of you, consider carefully what they are saying and look for ways to improve yourself. However, if they’re just being mean or rude, don’t let them discourage you. Stand tall and be proud of who you are.


2. Always expect respect.

When you’re overly concerned with pleasing other people, it’s easy to neglect your own needs. You might agree to a date when you don’t really want to go, or work late – even though you need the time off.

To be successful, always expect to be treated with respect by others. This means being assertive about your boundaries and not tolerating any behavior that is disrespectful or rude. When you don’t put your needs first, it can eventually cause resentment and make you feel used. In order to succeed, you have to be willing to take a stand and say no – even if it means disappointing someone else.


3. Feel free to express all of your emotions

Being kind and people-pleasing often go hand in hand. You might worry that if you express anger – or any other emotion for that matter – that it will upset others. However, bottling up your emotions leads to a lot of stress and anxiety.

Instead, feel free to express all of your emotions openly and honestly. This means that you can feel angry or sad, but you don’t have to hide your emotions from others. A healthy way of dealing with negative emotions is to express them in a safe space and then move on. This will help you stay true to yourself and not worry about what others think of you.


4. Express your opinions.

Being kind is great, but it’s also important to express your opinions and thoughts. This can be difficult if you’re overly concerned with pleasing others, but it’s crucial for success.

Try to have regular one-on-one conversations with the people you care about the most. In these discussions, feel free to express your opinions, even if they might be different from those of your loved ones. This includes expressing your opinions about their behavior and how you feel when you’re around them. By being honest and open, you can create a deeper connection with the people in your life – and make your relationships stronger as a result.


5. Practice self-care regularly.

It’s so incredibly important to take care of yourself if you want to be successful. This means prioritizing things like exercise, healthy eating, sleep, and social activities – even if you don’t have time for them right now.

You might need to make some changes in your life, like staying up later to get work done or skipping the gym to fit in a meeting. But as long as you continue to prioritize your own needs, you will be able to achieve success and happiness over the long-term. So, make sure to practice self-care regularly – and give yourself permission to do so!


6. Say no!

This is a key habit for success – particularly if you want to move up in your career or advance your business.

When setting boundaries, don’t worry too much about hurting someone’s feelings. If you want to decline an invitation or turn down a work-related request, say no without feeling guilty. Remember that you have a right to prioritize yourself and your needs, and that it’s okay to disappoint others occasionally if needed.

When you practice saying no, you will be better able to set and maintain your boundaries. This means that others will respect you more and come to rely on your honesty and assertiveness. As a result, you will be much more successful in all areas of your life!

Overall, it’s important to remember that being kind does not mean being a pushover. By putting your own needs first, expressing your emotions openly, and practicing self-care regularly, you can find success without sacrificing your well-being. So go out there, be kind – but don’t forget to be strong too!


7. Have the courage to ask for what you want.

In order to be successful, you also need to have the courage to ask for what you want. This might mean asking your boss for a raise or promotion, speaking up in a meeting when an idea comes to mind, or reaching out to a potential client or investor.

Often times, people are afraid of asking others for things, even if they deserve it. This can cause you to fall behind, as you don’t have the same opportunities that others do. So, be willing to take a risk and ask for what you want – even if it feels uncomfortable at first. With time and practice, this will become second nature to you!


8. Fail and make mistakes.

As much as we might want to avoid failure and mistakes, they are actually an important part of success. This is because every time you fail or make a mistake, you learn and grow from the experience.

You can use this knowledge and insight to move forward and achieve even more than before. So, don’t be afraid of failure – embrace it as part of the journey to success! And if you need help recovering from a setback, try seeking out support or guidance from others. You are not alone in this process.

9. Pursue what makes you truly happy

If you’re always trying to please others, your happiness will depend on their approval, and not what truly makes you happy. From this place, you’ll always be afraid, under-expressed, oppressed and in fear. If you let people take advantage of you, it’s not only dishonest to them, but it also slowly wears away at your happiness and success.

Find what lights you up inside and pursue it relentlessly. This might be a new hobby or venture that brings you joy, or simply spending more time with the people and activities that truly bring you happiness. By prioritizing your own needs and desires, you can create a rich and fulfilling life – one that will lead to true success over time. So, pursue what makes you truly happy, and let that be your guiding light on the path to success.

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